Networking
From HowTo.Lifehack
Networking is forming relationships. Becoming a good networker comes down to a few major factors:
- Extroversion
- Social Skills
- Connection Points
- Altruism
- Confidence
Contents |
[edit] Extroversion
In order to be an effective networker you need to actually meet people. This can be in large conferences where hundreds of people are gathering, or even strengthening one-on-one connections with another person. Extroversion is the tendency to seek social stimulus and it is present in all of us, just to different degrees.
Introverts can be great networkers too, and introversion can actually become an advantage when dealing with one-on-one ties. But if you shy away from meeting new people, it can become a handicap. Try joining new organizations to meet people and practice your speaking skills.
[edit] Social Skills
Social intuition is a skill that takes time and practice to develop. The basics are available to most people, knowing the cultural norms and expectations of behavior. But some people manage to excel in their people skills. Charisma, being likable and friendliness are an important part of networking.
The only way to increase your charisma is to practice. Go meet people, vary your approach and try different styles of communication. There aren't any quick fixes.
Some people believe actively working on your charisma is manipulative, and that you should only "be yourself." I disagree. Manipulation is intention. Charisma is simply the ability to communicate and connect effectively, whereas manipulation intends to control behavior through deception.
[edit] Connection Points
Where are you going to meet people? This is the biggest question for any would-be networker. There are a number of meeting places:
- Organizations
- Conferences
- Direct
- Through friends
- Online
Don't specialize in one mode of connection or you might miss out on entire groups of people. Attend conferences, organizations, make cold calls, get references and meet people online. All of these can work even if they require different approaches.
A bigger question is how do you meet the elite? Many people who would be invaluable network contacts are difficult to get to. Bombarded by requests they put up defenses to control the flow of new people in their life. Here are some suggestions I've seen work when trying to reach the so-called "untouchables":
- Volunteer. Many big names are philanthropists. Volunteering for organizations can get your foot in the door to meet them.
- References. Friend of a friend? Get personal references to distinguish you from the masses.
- Direct. What's the worst that could happen? I know people who appear busy but are still approachable. There are also people who don't seem to be giants but are incredibly hard to reach. Send out a friendly e-mail or phone call to find the difference.
[edit] Altruism
Help others to help yourself. Networking is built on reciprocity. You need to be more than willing to oblige the favors of your network if you would like those requests returned. Helping others also strengthens connections, decreasing the chance that you will lose touch later.
What can you do for other people:
- Expertise. If you are an expert on a particular subject, people in your network can go to you for answers.
- Honesty. Be the person friends go to when they want the honest truth from an objective perspective.
- Empathy. Stand for emotional support and encouragement.
- Connector. Help friends meet new friends. Be the hub of your network.
Don't just wait until your connections ask for help. It takes courage to ask for a favor, so many people won't do so unless it is desperate. If you can help even when you aren't asked you can become a lifeline to another person. Recommending connections to someone entering a new career, looking for jobs for another person or researching info for them can be great ways to go the extra mile.
[edit] Confidence
Confidence is important for networking for primarily one reason: confident people ask. Don't be the passive participant in your relationships. Be active. That means taking the initiative when lending help, strengthening ties, arranging meetups, maintaining connections or asking for favors.
Relationships are mutual so you can't be the only party involved, but you should always strive to take an active role. If you simply sit and wait for other people to meet you, ask for help or provide favors you might be disappointed by how little gets done. Instead take the initiative to tackle connections head on.
What are some ways you can take the initiative?
- Meet people. Don't wait for people to introduce themselves, go up and talk. I've found in most social settings where people are meeting (conferences, organizations or gatherings) the following approach works well, "Hi I'm ____," followed by a handshake. Nothing elaborate, but it works far better than sitting in the corner waiting for people to come to you.
- Strengthen Connections. Set up future meeting times. Get to know the other person. Don't wait to hear the other persons life story, ask questions and actively listen to find out more about them. Drop hints about yourself to keep the conversation flowing.
- Maintaining Connections. Regularly contact everyone you know on a semi-annual basis. The practice of "pinging" or sending out occasional cards or phone messages can be a good way to keep hold of weak ties.
- Help. Don't wait for favors to be requested and just help out.
- Favors. Ask for help when you need it. The notion that connections have a bank account that can go into debt from favors is outdated and inaccurate. Every offer and request to help strengthens ties. You don't want to become a leech only asking and never helping, but most people end up neither asking nor giving and their relationships suffer.
[edit] Tips for Networking
- Use business cards. Make some of your own if you're not networking on behalf of your employer. Clever doesn't get you calls back. Being memorable and having a business card gets you calls.
- Be genuine. Never network just to collect cards and add names. That's another whole model, but it's not one that I'll support. Be who you are.
- Think bigger than you imagine. Talk with people about things that you're planning to do as if they're already half done, but only if you're pretty sure you can deliver.
- Remember people's names and snips of conversation. If you're horrible at the last part, write on the back of their cards. You WILL forget by the time you get home.
- Make sure your business cards have some room to write, too. Never leave some one flipping your card over to jot a note, only to find an unwriteable surface.
- Email people or call them when you get back from the event with a quick brief thank-you.
- Have a sturdy handshake.
- Look them in the eye.
- Refer business to them and tell them.
- Always give them 2 more cards. One for themselves. They can use it to refer you with the other
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